My dairy – 'The 152 pages with you'. 23rd page.

The day when I stand alone on the ‘line of intense’ to tell everything to you.......

The day when my new dreams started, it was casual…

They told me new stories which were almost unusual.

I really don’t know what’s false and real..,

It was a totally new experience to me never ever happened before, I was totally not trained to act to it …

I told you everything…….. Pls forgive me..  

The day came, when I not able to keep inside me, I was not able to act anymore with you.

……cntd . I told just… now really embarrassed to talk… with what face!!??, with what expression!!?? To talk with you, I just really numb … sometimes for minutes or sometimes hours, thinking and thinking …

I was literally held by ‘dual’ playing with me…'heavenly play with snake' , 'the whispering near the ears' what are those??  .cntd

more to talk with you ‘ saahiti’ with ua permission.  I want to talk face to face.. enough of virtual world .

But I am sorry, I know i have betrayed you,but u always done good for me.. ‘I am not that what you see in the reflection of mirror ’.

You may think that why?? I am not come and tell everything, but I really afraid of loosing you and ua hope on me.

“ Oh!! Rain come wash all my confusions,

Ooo clouds ,drop ua tears on dry plants…

Make our ‘shimoga‘ malnad again…”

i really don't know to how to write or talk.....with you, any error pls forgive me.....

- ssanchari  

  

ua name to a star..

Remembering the day , when I named ua name to a most twinkling star .. ,

(Sirius appears to twinkle or shimmer more than other stars for some very simple reasons. It is very bright, which can amplify atmospheric effects and it is also very low down in the atmosphere for those in the Northern" hemisphere)

Don't know why but... just named it .. I think I am world's happiest idiot to do this ...
"From a long distance... The star is twinkling and twinkling...
It seems to be singing...
The limitless time , bringing this...
my magical vision inside me telling these..
Isn't it beautiful ?? What a wonderful song !!!.
Isn't u and that star  same ...
Always busy in  coding... The twinkling are natural colourful coding ..but my poor vision unable to encode those.. but  one day I will...if time permits..o time let me talk everything ....
ಕಾಲಯ ತಸ್ಮೈ ನಮ:...
-ಸಂಚಾರಿ

She

$he landed into new world called whatsdown planet  on my birthday from extra- tresstrial orbit,

it's  in North direction I think so ... .she was like a god sent friend from Dhruva nakshatra.. , She never talked ,never saw. but, I  chatted and chatted with her with help of display and keypad .

Finally , i told the truth and dilemmas I was facing , which were  quarrelling in my mind , she simply solved my dilemmas like breaking a stick and   pulldown me down from ತ್ರಿಶಂಕು state to real world .

she  stood like a backbone of feelings, 

She guided like a teacher , 

she  brought me to ವಾಸ್ತವ................

she listened to a my mind,cared...so on

 "Dreams told me,that she is a devotee of Rama ,

She realised me that feeling are just age's drama".

But , one day she disappeared , but.. she listened.. , I chatted and chatted .. no reply ... A shock!!! struck to my mind... Still my mind strucks if I remember her and becomes dumb , for what reason don't know ????.

Time passed , days passed ...

 Mind started to become dual again, but past experience  made me to overcome all .., 

My mind started to search and search ...no where found .

Finally ,my mind  made a conclusion, but it was not a conclusion , still duality comes but ...as it is bound nature.. even the ultimate light energy has duality , what am I....??

. 

 Finally ...not finally..I think she left to her E -T orbit back ,..

For time being I made dualities as my friend s

 My one of duality says that..

 "she is Happy there.. you need to go to ua work. , 

And another  duality....says 

," why did u sealed my mouth "????, , ( I zipped it mouth)

I answered it , I have lost because of you ...!!!!.

 I am still fighting with that dumb duality...

But .

"I am still sending , gud morning signal to her  , though I know it can't reach it has been blocked "... But it's not a matter, it hurted but ,I am happy with my smiling mask .

By nature's energy

😒

As a symbol of my responsibilities and thank fullness to her ... and regretting for my immature behaviour..

Still hoping to talk to her ,one day I will..., The known unknown.

She now may be busy in her  work and burden...

If u find her pls ask her " why did she stood with me when I told truth and suddenly disappeared telling nothing when I was alright"

I know "I am no-one for her , but still ...  nameless bondage "

---

New s.k.a , moving to new planet Bhumi from whatsdown planet..

, A small.... useless , error full , imaginative story written , not to hurt anyone.many thought s are hiding ,but it's better to hide than sharing.

Thank you for reading.., and wasting ua time ..